She flies through the back door, she’s my older sister
She throws French phrases ‘round the room
She has ice skates and legs that fit right in
She’s wicked to all the beaming dreamers
Who’ll later boast of an evening
By her fiery side
Carly Simon, “Older Sister”
As a closeted fan of the album Comin’ Around Again, it saddens me to throw this tomato of lyrics into the beautiful face of Carly Simon, especially because the very reason that this song is lyrically flawed is the reason it is so raw, so honest. Unfortunately, Carly was born with squid-like tentacles instead of legs, and as a result was never able to ice skate like all of the other girls, including her older sister, who was also a Francophile. This song was a lyrical breakthrough for Carly, as she had previously attempted to conceal her condition by wearing bellbottom jeans, and refusing to be photographed from the waist down.